Every year in New York City, a five-foot penguin walks the streets.

He is actually half-penguin, half-chicken: “Chengwin.” And for whatever reason, this oversized Sesame Street hallucination has become an annual fixture in the streets of downtown Gotham. He always arrives with a cheering hipster mob, oftentimes with a live band in tow, to battle his archnemesis: his half-brother, Chunk. Chunk is half-chicken, half-skunk, and has his own entourage of black-clad musclenecks in dark shades. People rarely cheer for Chunk.

They battle. They literally rumble in the streets, mostly by way of head butts and kicks to the shin. But this is more than a mere guerrilla theater street fight: it is Chengwin versus Chunk, good versus evil. Ignore the hipsters behind the curtains: this is a morality tale, a fable come to life, and the fairy tale ending always wins out. Always, Chengwin emerges victorious.

The half-chicken/half-something family has expanded over the years: there is Chove, a half-chicken/half-dove whom Chengwin married in 2006; Chabio, half-chicken/half-Fabio, who is dreamy; and Chixon, half-chicken/half-Nixon, who is cantankerous. There have been weddings, foot races, and a Million Chengwin March. But always, there is the war.

Don’t ask why.